Continuing my stint of being a little bitch...I give you the latest chapter in the story...
I'll be one of the first to tell you, I've been a little depressed lately mostly due to things out of my control. It's kind of silly to say out loud because most things in life are out of our own individual control, but the things I've been attributing to my depression fit that particular bill.
I guess we could first define what I think depression to be and right now, that is a feeling of being lost and having a sense of no control in surroundings. Lately, that seems more of a state of being rather than a temporary thought/feeling.
The biggest factor to these new feelings would have to be based on what's happening at work. Back in late December, one of the managers I work with approached me regarding a position opening in his team which he wanted me to fill. Three months later, I'm still waiting and looking forward to the time I can put in my notice to leave my current position. I'm gracious for the new opportunity, but I feel enough is enough. I'm ready to move and to me, three months seems enough time to make this change. As with the last three months, the future will show its hand soon enough, so there is little I can do to change it.
Another factor to this depression mess is the news my significant other will require another shoulder surgery in late April. While not unexpected, it is relatively surprising since I'm the one who has been undergoing physical therapy for shoulder problems over the last few months. It's not a new issue for either of us, but the jump from “ow, my shoulder hurts” to “fuck, surgery scheduled for late April” was initially surprising especially given I was the one to avoid it for the time being after finishing a stint in PT.
In order to offset the incessant bitching in my everyday life, I do have a few things I'm looking forward to in the coming months: 1) a former roommate of mine is getting married in late March, 2) my annual “get the fuck out of the USA” vacation is scheduled for late April, 3) my brother Jared is getting married in August, and 4) one of my best friends recently bought a house.
- My former roommate in London is getting married in Denver in a few weeks. I am very much looking forward to attending as it has been a fuck of a long time since we last got together. Granted, most of the night he will be busy attending to other guests, but it won't prevent me from dragging him away from important people for random shots of Jameson at the bar. Look forward to that, buddy.
- The girlfriend and I have booked our annual “fuck the USA” vacation and will be headed to Costa Rica for ten days in late April for beach, surfing, and a shitload of sun (and sunburn for me). We'll be climbing volcanoes, walking around rain forests, driving tiny cars on tiny roads, and snorkeling with deadly animals. I can't wait...mostly because my work is required to leave me the fuck alone leaving me to actually enjoy time off.
- Jared is getting married!!! August is the time and it's going to be hot as fuck. I don't know a lot of details, but I'm really hoping he has a light colored suit like the last wedding I was in so I visibly sweat through the cloth. At the very least, I get to see my family and will have a few days of celebration, so we can all be thankful and happy for the soon-to-be married couple.
- Finally, one of my best friends bought a house recently and I volunteered to throw her a house warming party in the fall. She's one of the first I know who has taken the leap to home ownership and I think something of that magnitude should be celebrated. I know I'm nowhere near that kind of commitment to one particular city, so I can certainly appreciate the value of the decision. Way to go, Kate.
Much like previous posts, this isn't all that funny – so I apologize for it. Also, after writing and reading through the whole thing, I realize I don't really have much to bitch about. I would feel bad about it, but you really don't care anyway. It's all just based on frame of reference anyway, so things can always be worse.
Next time you'll know better...